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Post September 04 2003, 1:03 AM
Méabh
Scríbhneoir d'Éigean
 
Posts: 23921
Yep, under a yearbook photo of me looking pensive at my book in English class was written:

Lynn Schneider - all engrossed but nowhere to go
Is é Christian Stoehr mo chroí
Dáta pósadh: 16 Deireadh Fómhair 2010

 
Post September 04 2003, 18:33 PM
phelan
Scéalaí Mór
 
Posts: 1900
Ummmm, are you by chance living in a "cage" and have a "little friend" named Pinky!! :mrgreen: :twisted:
Phelan

labhair amach os ard 's tabhair bata beag leat.

Post September 04 2003, 18:41 PM
Méabh
Scríbhneoir d'Éigean
 
Posts: 23921
Sometimes I feel as if I'm living in a box...
Oh sorry wrong song....
Pinky, no, never heard, but didn't Ailill mention a cat named Bincí ?

:mrgreen:
Is é Christian Stoehr mo chroí
Dáta pósadh: 16 Deireadh Fómhair 2010

Post September 04 2003, 18:46 PM
phelan
Scéalaí Mór
 
Posts: 1900
pinky and the brain brain brain!!!! They were mice in a lab and the brain was going to take over the world. Pinky was his henchman!! The brains voice reminded me of peter lorre!
Phelan

labhair amach os ard 's tabhair bata beag leat.

Post September 04 2003, 18:50 PM
Méabh
Scríbhneoir d'Éigean
 
Posts: 23921
I know the series, I was just kidding :wink:
Is é Christian Stoehr mo chroí
Dáta pósadh: 16 Deireadh Fómhair 2010

Post September 05 2003, 1:04 AM
phelan
Scéalaí Mór
 
Posts: 1900
Sorry, like you said before, one can't read tone of voice in typing!! :oops:
Phelan

labhair amach os ard 's tabhair bata beag leat.

Post September 08 2003, 16:40 PM
Corvus93
Scéalaí Mór
 
Posts: 2279
This all started in my office as I give the 'dumb cow' awards out daily, usually to myself. I love the saying & have no idea where it came from. So my co-worker sent me the following: ENJOY


_____________________________________________________________



SOCIALIST

You have two cows.

The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.

You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.



REPUBLICAN

You have two cows.

Your neighbor has none.

So?



COMMUNIST

You have two cows.

The government seizes both and provides you with milk.

you wait in line for hours to get it. It is expensive and sour.

DEMOCRAT

You have two cows.

Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful. You vote

people into office that put a tax on your cows, forcing you to sell one to

raise money to pay the tax.

The people you voted for then take the tax money, buy a cow and give

it to your neighbor. You feel righteous.

Barbara Streisand sings for you.



CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE

You have two cows.

You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

DEMOCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE

You have two cows.

The government taxes you to the point you have to sell both to support

a man in a foreign country who has only one cow, which was a gift

from your government.



BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE

You have two cows.

The government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you

for the milk, and then pours the milk down the drain.



AMERICAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one.

You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows.

You are surprised when one cow drops dead.

You spin an announcement to the analysts stating you have downsized

and are reducing expenses.

Your stock goes up.

FRENCH CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You go on strike because you want three cows.

You go to lunch.

Life is good.

JAPANESE CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow

and produce twenty times the milk.

They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.

Most are at the top of their class at cow school.

GERMAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give

excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour.

Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.

ITALIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows but you don't know where they are.

While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman.

You break for lunch.

Life is good.

RUSSIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You have some vodka.

You count them and learn you have five cows.

You have some more vodka.

You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.

The Mafia shows up and takes over however many cows you really have.



TALIBAN CORPORATION

You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which are two.

You don't milk them because you cannot touch any creature's private

parts. Then you kill them and claim a US bomb blew them up while

they were in the hospital.



POLISH CORPORATION

You have two bulls.

Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them.



FLORIDA CORPORATION

You have a black cow and a brown cow.

Everyone votes for the best looking one.

Some of the people who like the brown one best, vote for the black one.

Some people vote for both.

Some people vote for neither.

Some people can't figure out how to vote at all.

Finally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell you which is the

best-looking cow.



NEW YORK CORPORATION

You have fifteen million cows.

You have to choose which one will be the leader of the herd, so you pick

some cow from Arkansas.
Táim buíoch le cibé déithe a bhéadh ann
as m'anam nach gcloífaí go deo.

Post September 08 2003, 17:04 PM
Méabh
Scríbhneoir d'Éigean
 
Posts: 23921
I like the last one the best!

I still can't believe that Billary is in charge of representing NY on Capitol Hill.

So glad I don't live there anymore...although there were more Irish people where I was growing up than where I'm livin now :mrgreen:
Is é Christian Stoehr mo chroí
Dáta pósadh: 16 Deireadh Fómhair 2010

Post September 08 2003, 18:24 PM
phelan
Scéalaí Mór
 
Posts: 1900
Thanks Corvus,

Always wondered the difference between a republican and a democrat!! :twisted:
Ah, barnyard politics!!
Phelan

labhair amach os ard 's tabhair bata beag leat.

Post September 08 2003, 22:34 PM
Corvus93
Scéalaí Mór
 
Posts: 2279
Ten Reasons To Go To Work Naked:


10. No one ever steals your chair.

9. Gives "bad hair day" a whole new meaning.

8. Diverts attention from the fact that you also came to work drunk.

7. People stop stealing your pens after they've seen where you keep them.

6. You want to see if it's like the dream.

5. To stop those creepy programmer guys from looking down your blouse.

4. "I'd love to chip in... but I left my wallet in my pants."

3. Inventive way to finally meet that 'special' person in Human Resources.

2. Can take advantage of your computer monitor radiation to work on your
tan.

And...drum roll...the Number One reason t o go to work naked:

Your boss will never say, "I wanna see your ass in here by 8:00!" ever again
Táim buíoch le cibé déithe a bhéadh ann
as m'anam nach gcloífaí go deo.


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